I’m 28, single and work at a small company. One of my bosses is lazy, holds grudges and can be vengeful — and he just crossed the line: He asked me last week if I would do him a favor and have first-time sex with his 16-year-old son. The way I handled it was a laugh and quick, ‘Sorry, I can’t.’ If I report him to our parent company, I’ll get fired, and I can’t lose my job. If I engage a lawyer, I probably could get a settlement, but then nobody in the industry will hire me. Do I just forget it, and move on?
How can you forget working for a crass, offensive jerk? Those in positions of authority at work need to be held accountable for such blatant, flagrant violations of decency, ethics and morals. If you and your boss had a good, close working relationship, and he was a decent guy in every respect and jokingly suggested the scenario you described, I can see forgiving the transgression. But based on your description, the guy is a jerk — so nail the sucker. If you get fired for doing so, then your case just got stronger — because it’s classic retaliation, and courts don’t take kindly to employers who do that. Tell your other boss what happened, and make it the employer’s problem to solve it.
I’m over 50 and have been unemployed for more than a year. I think my age is a factor. I’m working with an outplacement counselor who has advised I get a makeover. I’m not a woman, and I’m not going to dress like a 20-something. Isn’t this enabling age-discrimination?
If you’ve ever been to a gym, you’ve seen guys primping themselves in front of a mirror as much as any woman — so your response suggests you’re a bit “old-fashioned.” I don’t think your counselor is suggesting dressing age-inappropriately or getting a funky ‘do. I’m not saying age isn’t a factor in some decisions regardless of the law — in reality, age is more about how one presents oneself. The workplace is full of 60-somethings for whom age isn’t even a consideration because they’re smart, professional, etc. If your counselor is saying you need a make-over, it’s not an insult, and it may not be just about what you project from the outside.
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